rantings

| Friday, June 27, 2008

Yo peeps, I'm finally back from my 5 Days Arts Camp!

I daresay that this is one of the best camps that I have ever attended. The fun is not the only factor that makes it so cool. Now I kinda regret that I hesitated to sign up for this camp last year as a freshie because I can be almost 100% certain that the friends I would have made would have shared a much closer bond than those I have made during the O Week. Though my O Week friends are also great, I cannot help imagine this possibility :/

Anyhow this time round, I went to the Arts Camp as a councilor, as a 'senior helper' in layman terms. I was really really really in serious dilemma before the camp whether I should go for this camp because they only informed me on Thursday MIDNIGHT that I have a place in this camp because I was in the waiting list all along. ZT should know most of my frustrations because when I was at work I kept calling her and bugged her about it xD In the end she encouraged me to go, plus I also gathered many other opinions from other friends and they also encouraged me to go (even my boss was willing to give me a last-minute one week leave and encourage me to go too!) so I decided to give it a try. I'm not a camp type of person, you see. But I have decided to put an end to self pity of having a small social circle and went ahead to expand it myself.

I was quite skeptical about the outcome of this camp as I was initially being placed into this Orientation Group (OG) which consisted of everyone... I know nothing of. Plus some of them I don't really have very good impressions of them already in the first place. I felt really darn odd during Sunday night when we are supposed to camp over in school so that it's easier for us to welcome the freshies early monday morning. LUCKILY, I don't know whether it's fated or not, this girl from the OG I really wanted to go to (because I know some of the people there at least) wants a switch with me. So I happily accepted the switch and I REALLY FELT SO MUCH BETTER OKAY.

I can like go on blogging about when happened every day in the camp, but that would be too long-winded. The games are pretty much like those really traditional camp games you will find in university camps (meaning most of them are pretty... match-making in nature, like a guy supposed to carry a girl up with their mouths biting a biscuit and running to another end of the race... >.>; luckily I wasn't supposed to play. The joy of being a senior. lolololol). In this camp I got closer to 3 girl seniors and made new friends! I got closer to 2 of the same year girls, and of course my whole OG freshies. Though I know very well as school starts the freshies will eventually segregate and hang out on their own as seniors being seniors, we don't have much chances taking common modules, it really is comforting to feel that you KNOW MORE PEOPLE and you have more familiar faces to smile at while walking along the corridors :) UNIVERSITY FRESHMEN CAMPS ARE VERY VERY IMPORTANT!!! They will really make a difference in your university life.

Actually I still find it weird that this camp's over. It almost really flew by, except during Day One when things are really slow and that was the only time I really felt like I regret my decision to go to camp and not sticking to my work xD Time really flew by after the boring Day One and in Arts Camp being in a crazy faculty, the guys are like damn shameless, maybe it's only my OG but they WALK AROUND THE HOSTEL ROOMS HALF NAKED with only their boxers and damn proud of themselves. Really cannot stand them! If they weren't funny and not my juniors, I would have slapped them in the face xDDD

Earlier this morning while I was still in the camp, I only slept at 7am because no one wants to sleep knowing it's the last night we will be spending together. Slept till around 9am and miraculously, I'm still pretty much awake to blog about this camp right now! Though I think I would most likely concuss later once I lie on my bed (I haven't tried yet). Anyway my eyes are still swollen from all the crying earlier in the early afternoon. This is the first time I cried in the finale of a camp! They are damn shit people la. Purposely make those emotional videos and stuff and those seniors will make those more emo speeches and they will cry because it was really very very tiring in this camp (everyday we have less than 3 hours of sleep. It's really damn shag for us) but it's so comforting to see that 5 days ago, we are all still strangers and there we were, cheering each other on, reluctant to leave, damn high on spirits and suddenly, it feels that we are all surrounded by best of friends. Yeah I blame my freshies for making me cry! I managed to hold back my tears all the way till they insisted on me making a 'speech', not only me but all the seniors. That's when I really realised that that was the last time we will be sitting in a circle, talking nonsense and playing mini games to pass time.

Anyway, I can feel myself swaying already. I think it's a sign I need sleep finally! Hahha. I still need to wake up damn early tomorrow to go to my grandma house. I'm still thinking whether I should go to Orientation Week, but most probably not because it's normally more boring. After the weekends, it's back to work and the office for me, which I'm pretty eager to. Not because I'm a workaholic (I'M NEVER ONE) but although I had a lot of fun to finally doing something non-routinal in months, I'm glad to get my life back to order as well. I'm still a home-type person hahaha. I like things the way they are, the way I'm comfortable with. Occasional interruptions are okay but I hate them too frequently. Because of this camp my internal biological clock is interrupted like crazy, I had never slept earlier than 3am for the whole week hahah!

Well anyway, I just realised that I'm really not a clubbing type of person. I don't get why people like to club, the loud music though catchy and stuff, I find them irritating and deafening most of the time :/ and I don't find it fascinating to squeeze with so many people on the dance floor and getting yourself suffocated and sweaty And I don't find the clubbing games that exciting either. Hah. The only thing I like about our clubbing night (thursday night) was the drinks. I like Baileys with milk! LOL. I'm not an alcoholic, I just like to drink occasionally. I hate beer though. Maybe I dislike clubbing because I realised I can't shake for nuts. I would rather just sit around and chill :P

Okay, today rounds up one of the most exciting and interesting chapter of my life this year, and my eyes are still feeling really swollen and dry from just now. *feels damn emo* XD Really man, it's good to expose yourself to camps once in a while. I'm really glad I made the decision to go for it rather than just staying in the office typing and working on the same stuffs everyday. I realised that our undergraduate days are really limited, whilst I can enjoy university, I should. I can work for the rest of my life after I graduate! But being an undergraduate is once in a lifetime :D

Wow, this is one of the longest post I have posted in my entire blogging history! LOL.

Shuf

Created at 10:21 PM

| Thursday, June 19, 2008

After using LJ for over a week, I really think that LJ is so much convenient to update my stuffs. But I refuse to let go of here. The memories and secrets here are too much to be given up xD

Plus, I think LJ has lesser privacy for some reason. People can find your journal really easily through 'Comments'. But it's userpic function is so much fun... T_T

*Begins to imitate LJ's style of userpics in here XD*

Okay I'm being really stupid, but it's fun xD

I wanna update a really long post today because while I was walking to the mrt this morning I thought of many things. Maybe I will update later in the afternoon.

Shuf

Created at 10:42 AM

| Tuesday, June 17, 2008

KUNG-FU PANDA must be one of the funniest movie I have watched for years lol, since I was never a very comedy movie person. I swear, in that 1 and a half hour movie, I laughed more than I have laughed for the past few weeks LOL.

Not because for the past week I have been emo xD it's just that there wasn't too much things to laugh at. Er, I completed FFX last Saturday, the ending was saaaaad. So yeah xP

Okay this is pretty much a rubbish post, it's 9.40a.m, and my boss isn't even here yet. Great. Watch Kung-fu Panda if you need a laugh, good comedy :D

Oooo I have started on FFX-2. Okay, I think I'm becoming a hopeless FF gamer.

Shuf

Created at 9:37 AM

| Thursday, June 12, 2008

Thank goodness I have stuff to do now, I almost bored out of my mind in the office, for I had absolutely nothing to do since 9am to 3.30pm rofl. So I'm basically collecting money from UOB by surfing the net. How nice eh?

Anyway, during my mundane period today in the office, I created a livejournal account. How nice. I have absolutely no idea why I did it, I guess when someone's mind starts to act abnormal, he/she acts weirdly as well. Haha!

Here's my livejournal:
north-liv.livejournal.com

Very predictable username. LOL. I haven't done anything to it yet, just a random first entry so that it wouldn't look so empty xD

I admit livejournal's more user friendly than blogspot. And much, much efficient and faster. More interesting applications too. But that remains my secondary place to rant. Probably I would only use it to update unimportant stuffs lol xD This blog, and my previous blog which I still keep the achieves, will remain as my primary ranting place. For this blog it's not as open to public, only to friends (I CAN SEE) lol.

Anyway, I have no idea how I am supposed to find enough materials to update both places xD Okay one thing, the more personal posts will still be here. Most probably when I find it too tiresome, I would just scrap off my lj. xD

Shuf

Created at 4:26 PM

| Friday, June 06, 2008

There's something really sinister and fishy happening to both of my hands.

I swear someone has put a curse on it.

Because, they are no longer coordinating as well as the usual.

Okay, before you start getting ?___? about wth i'm trying to say, I'm actually having a pretty big trouble preparing for my piano exam come September this year. I must say I'm really pretty damn stressed. First time, if ever. I never sweat about piano exams before, not because I'm confident, but because I never gave a big damn out of it, and I would get freaking nervous about it and regretting why I didn't practise as much as I needed when I was sitting outside the exam studio, and I will end up (surprisingly) passing the exams. Hmmm.

But this time round, I can feel it's different. I have a very, very bad feeling about this exam this time round. I rarely blog about my piano life, because I dislike it. I like playing the piano, I like the feeling about playing a piece you personally like yourself, and expressing it to your own liking. But I know I have no extraordinary talent. I'm those, who have to work harder than others in this musical aspect so that I can pass. PASS.

Okay anyway, since I'm working in the weekdays now, so practically my whole day is gone when I got off work. But this time round, I feel so unprepared that I insist on practising at least an hour after work no matter how late it was. Every night without fail.

This undying diligence even surprised my family members.

I think they sensed something is wrong. Recently I just confided to my brother about the stress of the upcoming exams I'm going through. I don't know whether he really got it, but I must say if I don't pass the exam this time round, I don't think I can forgive myself, But yet... the syllabus suddenly seems too advanced for me, suddenly I can't catch whatever my teacher wants me to do, I feel my fingers jumbling up and entangled whenever I play. I feel so SIAN can.

My mum had so much hope on me completing this, she even wished for me to get to diploma level. DIPLOMA. Gosh. That's like, going polytechnic and getting something equivalent. But I would rather do physics my whole life than torture myself getting a diploma LOL

Because I know myself the best. Once again I stress, I'm just an ordinary music student. I'm no musical prodigy.

Stop stereotyping about all pianists being able to perform in front of people whenever they like, and they can play whatever is presented in front of them. Because in fact, only a minority can do that.

I dislike the fact that people assume I'm an expert when they knew which grade I am in currently. HELLO? Grade doesn't equal to skill. Though it takes pretty much to get to grade 8 as well (you have to pass a freaking total of 7 practical exams and 5 theory exams to get to this stupid grade), that I agree because I suffered a lot to get to this grade xD but I hereby declare that again, I'm no musical talent.

I feel that my low self-esteem for my piano is caused early in my piano life, when my brothers dissed me about the frequency of my tripped playing. From then on, I never had the courage to perform to anyone anymore.

When I practise, I insist that no one's to be entering my room. I even shut the door. My family never had the chance to watch me 'officially' perform. Let's just say it's because of them that this happens. Because it wasn't only my brothers who teased me previously.

I'm not pushing the blame. It's 100% true.

Anyway, I digress too much. I swear that my fingers are cramping up due to the vigorus practising these days because my fingers aren't accustomed to so much movements in so few days. I'm feeling a little low in morale for this preparation for exams. Thus, I ramble so much in this post.

My first post about my piano life and see how negative it is LOL. Not exaggerated at all... I just typed whatever I had been yearning to pour out for years that's all.

By the way, I had finally started practising on 'To Zanarkand'. After 5 years of delay HAHA.

Shuf

Created at 2:34 PM

| Wednesday, June 04, 2008

OMG. I just had my first ever inter department meeting!

Last friday I had my first phone conference meeting with the IT department. I thought that was bad enough already (because I was so damn nervous about not getting my part right because after all, it's my first ><) but it went okay. THEN my boss had to only inform me at 10a.m. that there is this meeting face-to-face with the IT department again at 10.30a.m. I was damn shocked. LOL.

Anyway I went and just came back, and I met with the department (it didn't help because their boss is with them as well) and I did my part. Of course I was damn freaking nervous. LOLOLOLOL. The other boss was exxxxxttttreeeemely picky, keeps firing me questions like testing me on the project like that -.- But he's quite nice la, though picky. xD Not unreasonable as well.

I think I got more than I bargain for in this job. I need to demand a pay rise for doing so much stuffs temps aren't supposed to do <.< Sure I had intra team meetings before, but those are with people you really know so it's not that bad. Well, at least the experience will worth more than any money i earn :)

Okay now I'm in the office so I can't update much, will blog soon when I have ze time. I miss getting online to msn and get involved in those fun and massive msn convos =/

Shuf

Created at 11:23 AM

Profile

SF, 19 *sigh*
thinks search engines are more of a nuisance than help
is a fangirl of FFVII, FFXIII Versus
can be really crazy beyond hope if she feels restless
thinks she has no musical talent, but plays the piano anyway.

Loves

to slack around. I love rotting at home than going out the whole day shopping. and i'm serious.

Link Out

[Avril]
[Cecilia]
[Emily]
[Jason]
[Jueling]
[Jeslin]
[Justina]
[Kah Lok]
[Kelvin Soh]
[Kelvin Soo]
[Kim Soon]
[Liyana]
[Ming Hao]
[mlln]
[Pei Zhi]
[Qin Qi]
[Thomas]
[William]
[Yvette]
[Zhen Ting]

Express